It's like you're having a good time. You are at work laughing with your comrades..."
"Comrades?"
"Your eating your Pot pie and talking about 60 Minutes."
"Or the wing span of the Scarlet Robin."
"Then you go home and your with Madeline or Selina.."
"Deadra."
"And she's brushing her teeth and your watching her and then something simply comes over you. Something fucking comes over you hard, right?. All of sudden you've lost it. It all becomes bullshit. And it's not that you think life isn't worth living anymore. None of that shit 'that my life is a lie' and I want to travel the world playing the oboe. Life becomes unbelievable to you. It is illusionary. This shit is not real, this chair, this room can not be understood anymore, right?"
"This is right after dinner and Law and Order?"
"Yeah."
"Madeline and shit? No more Madeline?"
"Yeah no more Madeline. And only in her case because she can't see it."
"But in your case you could swap out Madeline for a woman you met at the bar."
"Possibly yes."
"So what does this all mean? You think we will be able to finish lunch here?"
"Yeah lunch is fine."
"Ok."
"I'm just seeing something that I've never seen before. I'm seeing a singular behavior instead of people and things."
"Ok. I guess."
"What I'm saying is I don't see a person or a job or whatever else as the source of this new development. I see a collective state of all of these things. I see all of the things working together to sustain this rues, right."
"It's a conspiracy."
"Right! It like there is this massive force intricately working to keep me blind to what's really going on and all of a sudden I just unknowingly stumbled into this awareness. Like I found a thousand pages of top secret papers."
"It's like the 70's and you got your hands on the Pentagon Papers, right?"
"Yeah."
"I can dig that."
"Yeah."
"I have no fucking idea what we are talking about here, but what does this all mean?"
"I don't know."
"You seem excited."
"I don't know. For some reason I feel a lot more relieved though."
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